ABOUT ME

Eric Bensoussan

Certified Relationship Coach & Nervous System Specialist.

14+ years of experience helping individuals and couples heal emotional disconnection through nervous system regulation.

For more than a decade, I have helped people recognize and shift the patterns that quietly keep them in survival mode.
My work is devoted to helping you rewire safety at the deepest level, so connection no longer requires performance, self-silencing, or emotional shutdown.

Lasting change only happens when every part of you feels safe — your thoughts, your emotions, and your body.

That’s what most approaches miss.
When your system no longer treats love as danger, connection begins to feel natural again.

Most people do not realize they are not relating from who they truly are, but from who they had to become to feel safe.

You can love someone deeply and still feel unsafe in their presence.

You can be emotionally intelligent and self aware, yet still find yourself shrinking, people pleasing, or overthinking the moment love becomes real.

Not because something is wrong with you but because your body learned long ago that love had to be managed, predicted, or earned. If that feels familiar, I understand it personally. This is not where my work began. It is where I lived for most of my life.

MY TURNING POINT

For more than twenty-five years, I sat in therapy rooms trying to understand myself. I learned how to talk about my emotions, but no one ever helped me feel safe inside them. No one named the truth that my body was still bracing every single day, even in moments of peace.

I spent years taking everything personally, constantly monitoring myself and the room. I became the person who anticipated everyone’s needs before they were spoken, not because I was naturally selfless, but because I was terrified of being rejected or misunderstood.

The voice inside my head wasn’t my true self. It was the echo of an internalized parent, critical and demanding, always preparing for loss.

It took several relationships collapsing, not from a lack of love, but because my body could not stay present inside it. Eventually, it took my body shutting down completely for me to finally understand that nothing would change until safety existed inside me, not around me.

That moment of surrender became the beginning of everything I now teach, the moment I stopped trying to perform love and began learning how to remain present inside it.

WHAT I KNOW NOW

Love becomes painful not because we are failing, but because most of us are trying to love from a nervous system that has never felt safe. We are taught how to communicate, but not how to stay regulated while doing it. We are taught how to set boundaries, but not how to feel safe holding them.

Many of us carry an inner voice that keeps us on guard. It speaks with authority, but it is only fear, shaped long ago by moments when love felt uncertain. That voice convinces us to hold back, to apologize for who we are, to shrink in the hope that we will stay loved.

You cannot speak truth when your body believes honesty will cost you connection. You cannot receive love if your system has learned to associate closeness with danger. You cannot repair a relationship while your body is still preparing for loss.

This is why most relationship advice does not create lasting change. It tries to adjust behavior while the body is still in protection.

Real transformation begins the moment your nervous system experiences, even for a moment, that it is safe to be fully yourself and stay connected.

MY APPROACH

My work is grounded in a simple truth: lasting change only happens when safety exists in the body, not just in the mind. Most people try to think their way into better relationships, but the patterns that keep them stuck live much deeper. They live in the body’s instinct to protect itself.

For more than thirteen years, I have guided individuals and couples through a process that helps their nervous system stop treating love as danger.

My approach blends emotional safety, nervous system regulation, and practical integration, so change becomes something your body can trust.

We begin by understanding the three layers of safety that shape every relationship:

When these three layers align, you stop reacting from protection and begin relating from presence. From there, we move through three key movements that mirror the body’s natural healing rhythm:

This work moves at the pace your body can receive, not the pace your mind demands.

The result is not just awareness but transformation that lasts, a way of being where safety becomes your foundation and love becomes something you can finally rest into.

Over the years, I have witnessed people rediscover what it means to feel safe inside love. Individuals who once lived in constant self-doubt now feel grounded in who they are. Couples who once could not speak without hurting each other now know how to pause, regulate, and find their way back to connection.

These transformations are not dramatic overnight changes. They are quiet shifts that build over time, moments when the body no longer braces, when honesty replaces guessing, and when love begins to feel simple again.

Here are a few reflections from clients who have experienced this work:

“Working with Eric changed everything I thought I knew about love.”

For years,I kept choosing partners who couldn’t meet me emotionally. I thought something was wrong with me. Through our work, I finally understood my patterns and learned how to feel safe in connection. I don’t chase any more, I choose.

Sarah

“We didn’t need more communication tools. We needed to feel safe again.”

Before working with Eric, every conversation turned into a battle.We couldn’t hear each other. He helped us understand the nervous system behind our reactions and how to slow down when triggered. Now we can repair faster, and there’s softness again between us.

Michael & Laura

“For the first time,I feel peace inside my own body.”

I used to live in constant survival mode—always overthinking, people-pleasing, bracing for something to go wrong. Eric helped me reconnect with my emotions and stop abandoning myself. I feel grounded, calm, and finally present in my relationships.

Brenda

“Eric helped me see that my patterns weren’t the problem— they were protection.”

That insight alone softened years of self-blame.I learned how to listen to my body instead of judging my reactions.This work gave me back my confidence, my clarity, and a deeper connection to my self than I’ve ever had.

Paula

BOOK YOUR CLARITY BREAKTHROUGH SESSION

Ready to get clear on what’s keeping you stuck and finally shift the emotional dynamic that’s been draining you?

The Relationship Clarity Break through Session is a safe, high-impact space to explore what’s really going on and what’s possible when you stop trying to fix things from the surface and start reconnecting from the heart.

You’ll get a sense of how I work and how my approach can help you move forward. Together, we’ll dive into your current challenges, explore what’s really going on beneath the surface, and start identifying steps toward creating the connection, clarity, and fulfillment you’re seeking. If you’ve been feeling stuck or unsure where to turn, this is your starting point.